Your Successfulness

“When we think of failure, failure will be ours. If we remain undecided, nothing will ever change. All we need to do is to want to achieve something great, and then simply to do it. Never think of failure, for what we think will come about.”
–Maharishi Mahesh Yogi

What’s true success? What’s real, authentic, fulfilling success? Is it achievement? Is it made of goals, efficiency, and deadlines? Is it the kind that says, “The level of one’s success is measured by the depth of one’s wallet”? I’ve asked myself that deeply intriguing question for many years.

In fact, I used to be a go-getting, goal-setting, efficiency-minded, try-to-get-as-many-things-done-as-possible type of person; the type that never seems to have enough time for anything. And I do mean “used to be,” since one day the answer to that million-dollar question became as clear as crystal.

You see, success is who you are right now at this moment, regardless of where you’re going, what you do, or what you have. This might seem a bit abstract to you, but the truth is that success is not what you think it is.

Since time immemorial, the word “success” has been long equated with get-it-done-yesterday kinds of people. Especially in the entrepreneurial world in which we are emerging where business success has taken over what we used to call “job security,” success is highly over-hyped, excessively overtaxed, greatly misinterpreted, and oftentimes frustrating if not self-effacing.

We now live in a world that encourages a results-oriented, “get-to-the-point” mentality while at the same time we see some all too common themes appearing in our society. For instance, the family unit is slowly disintegrating. People are getting sicker and sicker. And crime statistically increases with every passing year where they used to be low. These things, of course, are not success.

Strangely, success in some areas seems to parallel failures in others. As time management guru Alec McKenzie once pointed out, we are now seeing in today’s culture the rise of many “successful” failures.

I do agree that success can be measured in many ways. For instance, a person may have achieved business success. Another may have won some important competition. A corporate “soldier” may have earned a senior executive promotion. And another may work long arduous hours in trying to make a living and feel productive by accomplishing many tasks.

But in all of these cases, once they’ve achieved so much some people fail in other areas, such as their marriages, the relationship with their kids, their health (mental or physical), or, paradoxically, their businesses.

While less tragic but worst, some stop and wonder where their time has gone or why they are not happy with what they have achieved up to now. They’ve climbed the ladder of success and, as Lao Tse once said, “Discover that their ladder has been leaning against the wrong wall.”

Some achieve success and ask, “Why am I not happy?” “Where has my time gone?” or, “I’ve worked hard (or all my life) for this?” In essence, outer success can be (and most often is) the catalyst in creating a lot of inner turmoil. This is why the kind of success I’m referring to, this true authentic success, is not what a great many people think.

For instance, real success is not about achieving more, doing more, or getting more. While that’s the way most people measure success, those things are not real for the measurement does not constitute the essence. Now, I know that some of you may not agree with me, especially if you’re a goal-oriented, achievement-minded type of person.

“Goals are essential to success!” is a rebuttal I’m often given in my seminars. I do not mean to contradict and I certainly agree that goals are essential for external success. I used to be a high achieving salesperson with a daily planner the size of my suitcase. With notes, to-do lists, project planners, goals, and date tabs protruding the dog-eared pages of my day-timer, I was always doing more or taking on more than what I can handle.

My defining moment, you might say, was when I lost everything; yes, every major thing in my life. During one cold fall weekday in 1995, everything happened in what seemed to be a matter of hours. The repo man came to take away my beautiful, fully-loaded Honda. I was evicted from my three-bedroom townhouse. My wife packed her bags, took my daughter, and left me. And then, the lowest of the lows for any high achiever, I was forced into bankruptcy.

I had to start all over… Literally. Whether this has happened to you or not is irrelevant. But if you have goals, live constantly in the future, and always seem to never have enough time, then after you’ve given me the privilege to explain myself you will probably discover that this book may in fact be one that you desperately need. Maybe your whole outlook on success will change. I hope it will.